Gavriela Person, 1968-1997

Artist, writer, activist, daughter, sister, and friend

[August 10, 2002 marked the 5th anniversary of the passing of Gavriela Maxime Ze'eva Person (aka Amy Lynne Akins), Founding Foundling and Bastard Goddess Extraoridinaire. She lit a fire within us all, and we proudly carry that torch. We share with you Denise Castellucci’s Eulogy for Gavi, written in 1997.]

Only Gavi could find the best words to define herself and redefine herself when she wanted. Her memory deserves far more eloquence than the words I can conjure here. Whatever description I could personally come up with will certainly pale.

Gavi, one of Bastard Nation's founding foundlings, gifted us with dark, disturbing humor which shaped Bastard Nation into more than just an activist group, but a movement with soul and humor.

Gavi made us laugh, and made the uncomfortable comfortable and funny.

She was a contradiction. Gavi embraced her birth heritage while being resolved against searching. Her stories about herself and her whole being were contradictory, on purpose. Perhaps it was her way to emphasize the secrets and lies we live under, or perhaps it was to confuse the demons inside her.

She was an intellectual, an artist and a poet, and her words gush out and grab you, like the name, Bastard Nation. Her words were disturbing, raw, ribald and honest.

Gavi loved her Bastards.

She wanted us to peel off onion-like layers of ourselves in order for us to get closer to each other, like kin. Often, she would not understand how folks couldn't open up and expose themselves in the manner that she did.

Her nature was maternal; at the drop of a hat she would make sure you would eat a huge country breakfast, and would also offer words of healing. At the same time, she was a little sister, whom we worried about and felt helpless for in times when her illness would spin her out of control.

Gavi was the Magdalene and Moses of BN. She danced with ghosts. She danced with her Jewish and Irish ancestors and connected with their sorrows and the injustices inflicted upon them. She danced with her Bastardy. Gavi was the ultimate Bastard, living and celebrating the shame, and speaking of feelings and thoughts that many of us were afraid to utter or think, until she made it okay.

She was this warm tropical storm that would roll in to mix things up, challenge us, and make us laugh or cry. Sometimes the storm was pleasant, and sometimes it would get out of control. Who would have thought that this force of nature would cease to return after one of her many absences?

Many of us now, who felt overwhelmed by her last storm, would do anything to have her storm crash upon us again, because we want her back. Bitterly and sadly, all our second-guesses, regrets, things not said or done, will not bring her back to us. That truth stings and hurts like hell. We are going to mourn and mourn her well.

In our mourning, we should celebrate how she spent the short life she had here. By being a creator, she gifted us with a way to keep her near. Gavi will be with us every time we put on the BN T-shirt, laugh about something dark and painful, and develop a bond with a fellow Bastard.

We should feel good about who we are. This magnificent woman chose to give us her heart, talent and passion. Gavi’s spirit chose Bastard Nation as home, if only for a short time. She called this home, and she called us brothers and sisters. This fact offers me great joy, pride and solace.

Shalom and Requiescat en Pace, my dear Gavi. We will miss you well.

(This feature appeared in the Summer 2002 issue of the Bastard Quarterly.)